It's Not About You

Earlier I posted about a healing experience I had while participating in a breath work class.  I wanted to elaborate on that experience because I feel like the message can be applied to so many situations in all our lives.  The message also mirrors what I told by Mother Ayahuasca when I sat with her in ceremony early last year.  

Prior to sitting with ayahuasca, you are instructed to think about your intention for your journey.  To meditate on that for the week prior.  Having felt I had done all the healing I needed on my  “traumas” within the Akashic Records, I decided to set my intention to raising my vibration to love, the highest vibration.  Now I wasn’t expecting to come out of the experience an ascended light being, but I was definitely hoping to just get closer to that vibration.  Whatever elevation Mother Aya could help me ascend to in a single sitting with her, I was open to it and her messages.  About 45 minutes after drinking the “tea,” she came with a single message.  She wanted to show me that most scenarios in life that would frustrate, anger or upset me in a way that lowered my vibration were actually not about me at all.  I was taking many situations as a personal attack or some sort of disrespect when they in fact, had nothing to do with me.  It was all in my own mind.  She showed me a couple of scenarios that would typically raise my irritability or feelings of being disrespected.  Then she explained & showed me what was ACTUALLY going on and how it had nothing to do with me.  This deeper understanding allowed me to release the lower vibrations I felt towards those scenarios and raise my vibration closer to love.

Now to how this related to my breath work experience last weekend.  The scenario I was guided to address was a massive heart break from my late teens/early twenties.  It was my first love and it was a big one.  A 5 year relationship that ended with his best girlfriend leaving her husband for him and he leaving me for her.  This was 20 years ago and I really felt no pain from the loss any longer.  But the breath work session showed me that the animosity I held for both of them was still there, in my subconscious.  The message again was “It’s not about you."  Yes, my heart was broken but that wasn’t their intention.  Yes, it took me years to find a comfort in loving that deeply again but that was not their intention.  Just like the time, I had to break the heart of a person I so dearly treasured as a person, it was not about him.  Those two separate relationships had so much similarities, except in one relationship I was doing the breaking up and the other I was being broken up with.  Being shown this connection gave me a deeper understanding about the heart break I had in my 20s and allowed me to release the subconscious resentment I still carried because “It wasn’t about me.”

How many traumas, heartbreaks, frustrations, pain bodies, etc. can you feel back into and realize that they weren’t about you? I feel like there is so much that happens in our lives that send us into a place of sadness, stress, anxiety, and resentment that actually have nothing to do with us.  We need to let those go.  And that takes a lot of work!  A message I am still working on integrating after receiving it over 9 months ago.

If you’re not sure or can’t connect with the message, you can always ask your guides for help and meditate on it. 

-Caroline